It Gets Hard Sometimes...

It Gets Hard Sometimes...
Copyright © Kelvin Wilson
http://www.kelwilson.com

I've had a bit of a tumultuous week. Not really brought about by anything external though. I've been awfully hard on myself. I look back at my previous posts and see nothing but positive tidbits, filled with the hope that I can inspire others. But where can I go for inspiration?

I've been doing some thinking and asking myself some hard questions. Probably the biggest question is: who am I to try to do anything like this? It's almost as if I have run out of steam already. But that can't be the case! I've got so much further to go! I must go on. But like most of us, I want to see results like yesterday. It gets really hard to be in business online and remain patient when everyone is yelling about their new breakthrough product that promises thousands of dollars almost instantaneously. I wonder what I am doing wrong. Should I spend more money? Should I look to another system or program?

I know I don't have to do either of those things, and as a matter of fact, I would be shooting myself in the foot if I did. I am well aware of what jumping from program to program brings about. Absolutely nothing. I know from a rational, logical point of view that I am doing everything within my power to make this thing work and that patience will be the only thing that will bring everything together, but in my heart I want it all now.

Fighting a constant battle between your head and your heart is a very draining battle. I'm suffering some of the repercussions now. I am easily irritated both at work and at home. I am pushing the people away that mean the most to me and I want them to understand without fully telling them what's going on. If this seems like the ramblings of a person feeling sorry for himself, then you're probably right. I probably am trying to feel sorry for myself. But what I have to take from all this is that life goes on, regardless of how highly or badly I may think of myself. And sometimes we all have our down times, but as long as we don't wallow in the mire for too long, we should be okay.

As for me, well, I think I need some more time to mope.